Confessions of a Total World Dominator

Okay, so I'm cruising around Ebay last night (I've become quite the junkie, someone needs to come beat me or something) and I found some of the toys I used to play with when I was little and cute. There were Cabbage Patch Dolls (the ones with the cloth bodies, plastic heads, and signed butts), Rainbow Brite dolls, Fisher Price Little People (the ones that were basically plastic cylinders with heads...we used to get them stuck on our fingers..) all sorts of stuff....and it was all labeled as vintage! Our toys are now vintage! How in the world did that happen? It was only last week that I was dressing these dolls in my old baby clothes, and creating lavish dramas with romance, deceit...and plenty of bizarre plots (okay so maybe that really was last week, but that's not important right now) They've created modern versions of our toys which are greatly substandard, and not half as much fun as the ones we knew and loved. And our toys are slowly turning into antiques....but it's impossible! We're not old! We're barely in our 20's, and we're now part of the distant past....auggghhhhh!!!!!!! This can't be happening! Someone stop the world! Rewind, go back to 1984, I don't like this getting older thing! I didn't okay this, I signed no contract, I wanna turn back! TAKE ME HOME I WANT MY MOMMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Okay, I'm alright, I just had a minor crisis there, but everything will be okay. I just need a nap or something... Maybe it was too much Turkey...maybe not... Yes, we had the annual Thanksgiving festivities yesterday. We kept it small since half my family hardly talks to each other anymore...depressing.... I had to endure my youngest brother and his girlfriend wrestling on the couch...they make me sick! My mom did nothing but talk about her second job as a manager at Rite Aid, my dad was obsessed with football, my brother Jamie hardly spoke, my grandma basically complained about how tired she was, and Brandi and I just kind of tried to blend in....it was thrilling let me tell you....holidays are special....
I went to Meijer today, just because I've never gone shopping the day after Thanksgiving before. I'll never do it again...it was truly annoying. I figured that Meijer would be safer than Wal-Mart, and I was probably right, but it was still highly irritating. It was way too busy for 7:30am, and people just seemed to have a license to be completely brain dead and obnoxious. Parking their carts horizontally across an aisle to look at a matchbox car, yelling across the store, not even attempting to avoid crashing into other people, having intimate conversations in the middle of the most popular toy aisle, walking down narrow aisles side by side without budging an inch to let others through...it was amazing! I just pushed my cart through as carefully as I could and somehow made it out of there alive. I ended up getting a scanner for a pretty nice price which made the trip almost worth it, but not quite....I probably could have found a nicer scanner on ebay for the same money...but oh well, it was for the experience I guess. I'm going to go to sleep now!